Cheeseburger in a Can

If you're anything like me - and surely you must be, or else you wouldn't frequent a Morgue - the idea of a Cheeseburger in a Can is both revolting and intriguing. The fine, brave folks at The A.V. Club got their hands on one and gave it a taste test. Their conclusions are amusing to say the least. I'm still trying to figure out how there could be so many reactions to one tiny burger. They must have cut it up into some awfully tiny pieces. Perhaps that's all one can stomach anyway? I gotta admit, they've not turned me off entirely, and if a Cheeseburger in a Can ever rolls my way, I'll probably give it a shot.

Tell Me You Love Me - The Complete First Season

HBO’s Tell Me You Love Me is a difficult show to recommend, but that’s not an indictment of its quality. The series debuted last September, alongside the sixth season of Curb Your Enthusiasm – a programming move that likely hurt both series; it’d be similar to pairing CSI with Three’s Company. (Maybe that’s not the best analogy, but you get the idea.) Months before its premiere, the show earned a notorious reputation for its explicit sex scenes. So pervasive was the stigma that many probably tuned in expecting a Red Shoe Diaries type of affair. Those “many” were probably disappointed by its raw approach to – let’s call a spade a spade – fucking, as well as shaken by the complexity of emotions on display.

I admired Tell Me You Love Me immensely, but it's hard to explain why. Read the rest of this piece by clicking here and visiting Bullz-Eye.

Fucking Damon & Affleck

I have not seen Sarah Silverman's "I'm Fucking Matt Damon" video, which seems to have been jokingly aimed at her beau Jimmy Kimmel. I've also not partaken in Jimmy's follow up retort to Sarah entitled "I'm Fucking Ben Affleck." It would be far easier and less time consuming than writing this post to just go find and watch them. But this might be more fun.

All four of the people involved in this joke are talented to some degree or other. Damon's a pretty damn good actor who most always manages to work within his limits, and in doing so more often than not comes away looking good, even if the movie he's in is shit. Affleck, on the other hand, got sucked into the machine in an ugly way, and ended up doing all manner of crap to keep people happy and himself on the radar. When reports of him drunk and hanging all over strippers in Vegas surfaced, I understood the guy; if anything I'd say he was well behaved. And after seeing "Gone Baby Gone" this weekend, he's got a gold star in my book. But as much as I liked it, he's acted in so much nonsense it's only starting to even out. Ben and I would probably get along fine, so long as he didn't expect me to play poker ('cuz he'd whoop my ass). His overall career is one thing he wouldn't have to worry about me bringing up. I get it. I'm sure he does. End of story.

Sarah Silverman's hot, but I don't find her all that entertaining. I get why other people find her funny, but I know that I don't. By the time Kimmel's show comes on, I'm either away from the TV, watching something on cable or DVD, writing, hounding the 'net, etc. I've got almost no opinion of the guy other than he seems jovial enough. He's good on the roasts.

So there it is. I can't be bothered to check out these gags which have seemingly entertained millions, because none of the four people involved move me enough to make the simplest of efforts. Yet clearly I'm so aware of these bits that I've been driven to write a meaningless entry on the subject.

I feel like I might be missing out. I wonder if I am. I suspect I am not.

You tell me.

Blade: The Complete Series

Blade writer/director David S. Goyer was inspired by shows like The Sopranos and Wiseguy when he imagined Blade: The Series. His idea was to create a world with 12 separate vampire houses, in which various characters were continually at odds with each other in their diverse attempts at taking or maintaining control over the vampire underworld. He throws in an engaging spy, a sympathetic villain, corrupts cops & politicians, and drug abuse (in the form of snorting vampire ash) as a means of giving weight to what might otherwise be a silly world.

Find out if Blade: The Series sucks or if it's worth sinking your teeth into by clicking here and visiting Bullz-Eye.

The Mod Squad: Season One, Vol. One

You know the infamous Dragnet episode entitled “The LSD Story”? There are episodes of The Mod Squad that are alarmingly similar to it, only instead of two stodgy cops, there are three hip young kids on the case. The Mod Squad first hit TV screens in 1968, and it was an attempt to grab the youth audience while addressing issues that the youth culture was being exposed to, like recreational drug use, the peace and love hippie movement, and racial unrest. Indeed, as it appeared a year after “The LSD Story,” one wonders if it was something of an answer to Jack Webb’s square brand of policing.

Are Pete, Linc and Julie's adventures still solid? Will you groove with this DVD set? Find out by clicking here to visit Bullz-Eye.